


Burnout

by TheCrazyMasterless



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Dialogue-Only, Loneliness, Not actually Pale-Red Vacilation, Pale Romance | Moirallegiance (?), Sexist Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-18
Updated: 2016-04-18
Packaged: 2018-06-03 00:33:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6589504
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheCrazyMasterless/pseuds/TheCrazyMasterless
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What does he do with his nights? Droog sees his.... and is compelled to fuss over the jackass. Not much else to do on a Friday night.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Burnout

“Wake up.”

“Fuck you, you slimy asshole.”

“If you sleep at your piano, your back will be killing you and I don’t want to listen to your bitching tomorrow.”

“I don’t need you to walk me to bed, Droog, I'm not a damn child.”

“Good, then that means you are capable of responsible clothes ownership.”

“Huh?”

“You are not sleeping in your suit.”

“Goddamnit, Droog. Fussing over every little thing. Go mother an ugly duckling, you’ll feel right at home.”

“I am and I do. Don’t take off your shoes like that, you’ll scuff them.”

“Ugh. What’s got you in such an annoying mood? I thought you were out with a real barn burner tonight.”

“She canceled. Something about her house being in the middle of burning down.”

“Yeah, well you probably screwed up. You’da _had_ to; you hooked her somehow.”

“It wouldn’t have worked out; she wore open-toed heels.”

“... Shit you’re weird. At least you know what you’re getting with open-toed shoes. You’re _not_ getting a concealed knife in the leg.”

“ _Speaking_ of your romance life…”

“No we’re not…. Except I _swear_ I’m gunna get her next time.”

“Hmhm. Just be sure not to ‘get her’ in the middle of the Offalent gig.”

“You know how you screwed the pooch with that dame? You never have any fun, and she could smell it on you. Broads can do that.”

“That’s what cologne is for. If you had discovered it earlier, maybe you wouldn’t have developed your appreciation for open-toed shoes.”

“ _Not talking about it_!”

…

“Ugh. These cots are terrible. Fuck the piano, my back would be better off if I slept in a shallow grave.”

“Borrow my socks again and you will.”

“Don’t smoke in bed genius, you’ll burn the whole hideout down. Again.”

“Hm. What if I smoke in your bed?”

“You know the rules, Droog. Only when we’re drunk, and only when we’re both crushingly lonely.”

“Hm. Yes. Night Spades.”

“Night Diamonds.”

**Author's Note:**

> I know I didn’t quite nail it, but I tried to make it clear that Droog is not actually red romantically/sexually attracted to Spades; he’s just deeply lonely, and doesn’t know how to connect with people without sex.


End file.
